Perhaps you've seen it before. A public figure is interviewed by the media. After eloquently stating and restating her position, despite the reporters efforts to pound out more details, she relaxes and speaks her mind! Thinking that the microphone is off, she races through a litany of obscenities to share her disapproval of the interviewer and it's all captured for the world to hear because the microphone is on. If you're a manager or an executive there is a lesson here for you. You have the microphone and it is always on! As a positional leader within your organization, people are always watching and listening to you. You may be tempted to think that an after-hours conversation with a rising star is just "small talk about the future". If you believe you can have conversations like you're just another person on the team and it not affect your organizations culture you are wrong. While you may want to let your guard down to let off steam or you may want to share just a little insight with someone about the big plans you've been thinking about, remember, your microphone is always on. You aren't afforded the luxury of "just brainstorming" when your the leader. You gave that up when you stepped out of an individual contributor role and took on the responsibility of manager or executive. You're always the leader and when you speak people listen with a filter. "How does this affect me, the department, the company and what should I be considering and working towards as a result?" Your microphone is always on! Your team is continuously seeking feedback from you on key areas. So much so that even your innocent conversations (read dreams here!) can direct their future actions, beliefs, and understandings of where the organization is headed. All without you ever knowing it's happened. What's worse, if you're inconsistent with the messages you send, because they change depending on whom your with, it's double-trouble. Now, you're creating significant uncertainty among the team. No one knows who you are and they start to doubt what to expect from you. You think they aren't sharing with each other? Think again. Remember, your microphone is always on. Maybe you're reading this and you're aware now of the problems you've created by over-sharing. I've made that mistake in the past, too. I can help you increase your leadership ability in this area because I've walked the road of transformation that's necessary to see change. Schedule your free strategy session here. I had to learn the hard way that productivity as a manager and executive don't come from your technical skills. If you believe it does, then you're going to over-share. You'll do it because you'll think you know more than others and you'll think your helping by getting in everyone's business. You're not helping when you do this, so stop and take a different approach. You want to get your team involved and you want to make a significant contribution to the organization yourself. What worked when your weren't a manager isn't going to work now that you are. It's time to change. Your productivity is going to come from your leadership ability, not your exceptional technical skills, from this point forward. Here are tips you can use to avoid over-sharing and compromising your leadership effectiveness.
I'd like to hear from you. Have you ever forgotten that your microphone is always on? What's was the outcome and what did you learn as a result? W. Shane McKenzie is an executive coach and leadership mentor who helps leaders achieve greater effectiveness and become more fulfilled in their work by facilitating positive changes in their leadership behaviors. Join the Leadership Transformation Roundtable to get your copy of the questionnaire I use to discover how close my intentions match the reality of those I lead. What others are saying about W. Shane McKenzie "I would recommend Shane’s coaching to any leader. He has a refined process that allows leaders to see things in themselves that they might not be able to see otherwise."- Mel Munoz, Physical Therapist Assistant and Grad Student "Shane is a trusted friend and advisor who is passionate about people, life and developing leaders. I love his zeal for growth and how he exudes professionalism in every way. He is a tremendous leader and executive coach."– Sky Streety, BusinessExecutive and Management Consultant
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When my son was around 5 years old, he really didn’t like vegetables. My responsibility as his Dad was to keep him healthy and safe and that meant making sure he ate at least a few green beans before he had desert. I took responsibility for his choices back then, mostly by offering him limited options to choose from before dinner. “Would you like green beans or black eyed peas?” was a phrase I repeated often that year! And, it worked. He made healthy choices because I controlled his options. It was great because I kept him healthy and safe while he was able to retain his right to choose. I’ve noticed that managers and executives tend to fall into similar patterns when guiding their teams. Out of a desire to keep the business healthy and safe, we revert to thinking our responsibility is to give good choices and let the team decide which one they’d like to pursue. Especially when times get tough. We’re the manager or executive after all, right? We have to keep things safe and healthy. We give our approach a grown-up name like empowerment, delegation or brainstorming so people believe they have more ownership than they do. What we are really doing at times is searching for the choice to provide the team that is healthy and safe. We even start to believe it’s in the team’s best interest that we operate this way. What a mistake! I know because I made the unfortunate error of trying to lead this way. At that point in time I didn’t know that giving others choices doesn’t mean you aren’t controlling them. I demotivated others because of my inability to define problems that needed to be solved. As a result, I never cut them loose to use their strengths in developing solutions. This created doubt, confusion, and fear in others. Asking your team “green beans or black -eyed peas?” is the wrong question. How do you know if you’re controlling your team like I was? Here are phrases I heard from my team that let me know something had to change. I hope they’re as useful for you as they were for me.
If you recognize that you’re making the same mistake I made years ago, you can change. I’m proof it’s possible! It takes intentionality and many times an executive coach can help you work through the process of change more effectively than you could do on your own. A good first step to transform your leadership behavior is registering for a free strategy session that I’m making available to anyone who’s committed to a journey of growth. You can do that here. W. Shane McKenzie is The Leadership Transformation Coach. He helps leaders achieve greater effectiveness and become more fulfilled in their work by facilitating positive changes in their leadership behaviors. Join the Leadership Transformation Roundtable to get your copy of the questionnaire Shane uses to discover how close his intentions match the reality of those he leads. What others are saying about W. Shane McKenzie "I’ve worked with Shane for several years. He possesses a unique and highly effective combination of strategy, team leader and great communicator, a rare combination. He has a very strategic mind so he makes connections and sees disjointed paths where others do not. This allows him to both plot direction and execute the path to success. He’s truly committed to the greatness in others. He listens fully, asks the right questions at the right time, and gives us the space to both think and respond." - Linda Lindquist-Bishop, Strategic Facilitator, Speaker, Exit Planning for Business Owners, and World Champion Athlete “Shane has the ability to frame a conversation in a way that brings a thought or concept full circle. He’s excellent at tying each session together, which helped me recognize a pattern of growth. He’s not a “teacher”; he’s a discussion facilitator…in other words these sessions aren’t built around Shane teaching concepts. This method of facilitation opens the door for personal application, which is critical to this development process. He asked questions that forced me to think with intention.”- G. Williams, Product Manager “Shane is a trusted peer whose advice I seek when faced with leadership challenges. He brings clarity to tough situations and has been an objective sounding board for over 14 years!” – Pamela Westbrooks, Vice President of Administration Growing up I had to share a bathroom with my mom. On the counter sat an oval vanity mirror. One side magnified my facial features and the other side reflected me the way I was used to seeing myself. The way I thought I should look. My mom used the magnifying side to be sure every detail of her air and makeup was in place. It gave a deeper impression than the standard side of the mirror. I looked in it from time to time and I found it revealed more of who I really was than the general impression I got from the other side. As an Executive Coach and Leadership Mentor, I’ve found there are also two sides to our leadership impact. Just like there were two sides to my Mom's mirror. First, there is the impact we believe our business behaviors have on those we lead or interact with on a daily basis. What's business behavior? It's how we communicate with our words, facial expressions, tone of voice, and body language as we are going about doing our daily work with others. It's how we set expectations for people who we need to help us get work done, and also our ability to follow through on commitments we make involving others. For the most part, we all have the intention of making a positive impact on those we lead. We want to do well for others and be our best for them. Because of our desires to lead well, we often form an opinion of how we must be perceived by others that matches our understanding of "good leadership". We create a general image of who we are based on who we aspire to be, and we like it. So, that's the narrative we use when answering the question, "how well am I leading?". Emphasizing our intentions alone can lead us to a dangerous place. A place where we see our "wish we were" image and not the impact our current actions are having on others. This is where what most refer to as blind-spots originate. Second, there is the reality of how our business behaviors actually affect those we lead and interact with on a daily basis. This is the magnified side of the mirror. It's here that our intentions meet the truth of what others experience as a result of our presence in their world. The ideal of course is that our intentions match up with the reality of how we behave in the business context. That's called integrity- integrating our intentions with our behaviors. You see, it’s the combination of both sides of the mirror that tells the truth. We need both our intentions and reality in order to grow. We can't determine how much integrity we have between our words and our actions if we are only listening to our interpretation of "the facts". We have to do the hard work and ask those closest to us in our business how we are actually affecting them. And that's hard. I know it’s hard because I’ve been on the receiving end of a 360 evaluation where the truth of how my actions were impacting the team was revealed. You can read about that here. It’s hard because a disconnection between our intentions and our actions creates problems in our leadership. If I tell you how much I value honesty as a leader and when you're honest with me I am consistently defensive in response, there is an issue! The less aware we are of our blind spots, the greater the chance we’re falling short of delivering on our intentions. No one likes to see disparity between their intentions and their actions. It often hurts. It makes us afraid. We run away from pain and we tend to fight what we fear. So, we never rotate the mirror to see the other side- we just gaze into the side that tells us what we hope is real. We decide it's safer to not know the truth. If you’ve already been made aware of your blind spots and you’re looking for help navigating through the process of changing you’re behaviors, I’m ready to come along side you. Register for your free strategy session here. A lack of intentional action, once you know you have to change to be a more effective leader, is the genesis for stunting your leadership growth. It's the birthplace of complacency and it will prevent you from pushing forward toward achieving more of what you truly want- to be the best version of you as a leader. It doesn't have to be this way. You can face the fear and subdue the anger that may come when you face the disparity between your intentions and reality. So, get with a trusted friend and tell them you want to rotate the mirror and see a deeper level of reality. Tell them you want to know how your business behavior is affecting those you work with on a daily basis and that you want to see the truth of how closely your behavior matches your intentions. Ask them to be a sounding board and a confidant as you walk through the process. Then, ask five people you work with on a daily basis these 3 questions:
W. Shane McKenzie is an executive coach who helps leaders achieve greater effectiveness and become more fulfilled in their work by facilitating positive changes in their leadership behaviors. Join the Leadership Transformation Roundtable to get your copy of the questionnaire I use to discover how close my intentions match the reality of those I lead. What others are saying about W. Shane McKenzie "I’ve worked with Shane for several years. He possesses a unique and highly effective combination of strategy, team leader and great communicator, a rare combination. He has a very strategic mind so he makes connections and sees disjointed paths where others do not. This allows him to both plot direction and execute the path to success. He’s truly committed to the greatness in others. He listens fully, asks the right questions at the right time, and gives us the space to both think and respond." - Linda Lindquist-Bishop, Strategic Facilitator, Speaker, Exit Planning for Business Owners, and World Champion Athlete “Shane is a trusted peer whose advice I seek when faced with leadership challenges. He brings clarity to tough situations and has been an objective sounding board for over 14 years!” – Pamela Westbrooks, Vice President of Administration |
AuthorW. Shane McKenzie is an Executive Coach and Mentor who specializes in helping successful leaders leave their job to own a business using proven strategies to minimize risk. Archives
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