Working for someone else, whether a large corporation or a small business, shapes they way we embrace change.
Striving for a promotion teaches us to go with the flow of how others want things done. Striving for a raise teaches us to produce for others in hopes we get a bigger slice of someone else's pie. Striving to land a position in a new company teaches us to conform to someone else's expectation. While these norms may serve us well as employees they torpedo our effectiveness as entrepreneurs and business owners. Mainly because the way business operates is completely different. What got you to the top as an employee won't take you to the top as an owner. You must change if you truly desire to own a thriving business. That means we have to grow out of our old habits and thinking when we take the helm of our own ship. My and your ability to grow, to change ourselves, separates us from those who can't or won't. But, growth doesn't just happen overnight. Change doesn't happen in a day, it happens daily. Waiting until you've left your job to make the transformation is too late and will put you at risk. Growth follows an intentional plan that is consistently implemented over time. What area of your leadership are you growing so that you ditch the employee mindset as an owner of your business?
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”Spend less time trying to convince people, and more time trying to understand them.” My mentor Mark Cole, CEO of the John Maxwell Company, recently shared this thought with me. Mark's point is that great things happen when a leader seeks to understand more than to be understood. It’s caused me to ask myself a new set of questions- questions that I wanted to share with you in hopes they would challenge your thinking about what transformational leadership requires. 1. When do I try to convince people? For me, it’s when I put my agenda ahead of the people. I can slip into believing that winning with my idea is more important than people. It’s natural for me to argue my point, listen only for facts that support it, and talk a lot to try and convince people to adopt it. But natural is often selfish, especially when I miss the value of people in the process. 2. What happens when I try to convince people? Usually nothing good. Convincing people looks like me discounting what’s important to the other person, talking over them, or getting impatient with them. Am I the only one who's been there? No one responds positively when they are t valued. 3. How does the team respond to me convincing them instead of understanding them? People remember the experience the next time we have a discussion. They may hold back because I’ve been overly passionate defending my argument, to the point they don’t believe their opinion matters. Behaving this way causes them to be less willing to innovate, take chances, and own alternative solutions in the future. When I as the leader spend time trying to convince people to adopt my ideas or methods it disempowers them to a large degree. Instead, I can practice seeking to understand them and get a better result. Here is how. 1. Be intentional- It’s natural to try and convince, it’s leadership to seek understanding. No one drifts toward intentionality. We have to work to achieve it. Start being intentional about seeking to understand your team and their perspective. Ask more questions than you make statement and you'll be well on your way. 2. Listen- Not to validate my thoughts but to better understand theirs. Not to find faults in their argument but to understand their point of view. Listen for what's not being said. Watch body language and facial expression- they tell you more than words sometimes. 3. Admit mistakes- You and I will get it wrong from time to time. Rather than trying to justify our convincing ways, let’s own it and tell our team we recognize the impact it has upon them. Saying, "I've been trying to convince you and I see it's shutting your ideas down. Let's start over" is one way to own it. This builds trust and trust is the foundation of leadership. W. Shane McKenzie is The Leadership Transformation Coach. He helps leaders achieve greater effectiveness and become more fulfilled in their work by facilitating positive changes in their leadership behaviors. Join the Leadership Transformation Roundtable to receive dial-in details for Shane's next live teaching call on September 26th, 2017. What others are saying about W. Shane McKenzie “Shane has the ability to frame a conversation in a way that brings a thought or concept full circle. He’s excellent at tying each session together, which helped me recognize a pattern of growth. He’s not a “teacher”; he’s a discussion facilitator…in other words these sessions aren’t built around Shane teaching concepts. This method of facilitation opens the door for personal application, which is critical to this development process. He asked questions that forced me to think with intention.”- G. Williams, Product Manager We’ve all been there before. We sit in a meeting and share our point of view. As the discussion continues, we get the impression that people aren’t being direct in sharing their opinions. They choose their words more carefully than normal. They hint around and don’t fully express their ideas. They dance. You’ve seen this right? It’s like there is an elephant in the room but you can’t see it, no matter how hard you try. When you are the leader and you can’t see it, there’s a good chance you are the elephant. Early in my journey as a leader, I found myself in this position more times than I’d like to admit. It’s a sinking feeling to recognize something wasn’t right and yet not know what it was or how to find out. I would resort to trying to be nicer to people as a way to get them engaged in the process. I’d work on my body language and facial expressions when someone shared something I disagreed with, so as to help people open up. I monitored my tone of voice when I disagreed. These were all good thing, and none of them worked. They didn’t work because there was a problem I couldn’t see. Here’s what I lost when I was the elephant.
I was experiencing the reality that we all have blind-spots in our leadership. I’ve noticed I tend to judge myself by my intentions and others by their actions. This is what causes me to have blind-spots. My intentions and my behavior don’t always align and I need others to point that out to me so I can grow. Steps to Run the Elephant Out of The Room The next time you leave a meeting sensing that you were the elephant in the room, follow these steps to increase awareness of your blind-spots. Then, become intentional about growing yourself to eliminate them.
W. Shane McKenzie is The Leadership Transformation Coach. He helps leaders achieve greater effectiveness and become more fulfilled in their work by facilitating positive changes in their leadership behaviors. Join the Leadership Transformation Roundtable to get your copy of the questionnaire Shane uses to discover how close his intentions match the reality of those he leads. What others are saying about W. Shane McKenzie "I’ve worked with Shane for several years. He possesses a unique and highly effective combination of strategy, team leader and great communicator, a rare combination. He has a very strategic mind so he makes connections and sees disjointed paths where others do not. This allows him to both plot direction and execute the path to success. He’s truly committed to the greatness in others. He listens fully, asks the right questions at the right time, and gives us the space to both think and respond." - Linda Lindquist-Bishop, Strategic Facilitator, Speaker, Exit Planning for Business Owners, and World Champion Athlete “Shane has the ability to frame a conversation in a way that brings a thought or concept full circle. He’s excellent at tying each session together, which helped me recognize a pattern of growth. He’s not a “teacher”; he’s a discussion facilitator…in other words these sessions aren’t built around Shane teaching concepts. This method of facilitation opens the door for personal application, which is critical to this development process. He asked questions that forced me to think with intention.”- G. Williams, Product Manager |
AuthorW. Shane McKenzie is an Executive Coach and Mentor who specializes in helping successful leaders leave their job to own a business using proven strategies to minimize risk. Archives
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